Step 1: Shift Your Mindset [30-60 Minutes]

First, let’s address some of the mindset stuff that can hold you back from releasing your clutter.

Here are three of the main issues.

MINDSET SHIFT #1: You Can Keep Everything OR Your Sanity, But Not Both

So your home is filled with STUFF. Way more than you need. Way more than you use.

Not only does all the stuff not make you happy, but the constant chaos of having no space, the frustration of not finding things, the arguments with loved ones about what to do with it all – that makes you kinda miserable.

So here’s the thing: you have a choice. I’m not going to tell you to get rid of it. I’m not going to force you into anything.

What I am going to do is tell you a truth you need to hear. Are you ready?

You cannot keep that stuff and also be happy and sane.

Here it is again in case you conveniently averted your eyes.

You cannot keep that stuff and also be happy and sane. That stuff is costing you joy, peace, calm, yourself. Your life.

You need to choose between the stuff and the sanity.

Now if you’re thinking, Meh, sanity is overrated, well yes maybe, but happiness and peace of mind most certainly are not.

So by all means keep all the crap, rationalize it however you want – but realize the price you’re paying.

Or choose sanity, happiness, freedom – and prepare to let the clutter go.

Before we leave this step, please answer these questions. Don’t over-think – simply let yourself write for at least 5 or 10 minutes. The clarity you gain here will help you to finally break free of your stuff.

Questions

1. What is the clutter in my life costing me? Time? Energy? Peace of mind? Happiness? Calm relationships? What else?
2. How would my life be different if I let this stuff go?
3. How would I feel about myself if I let this stuff go?
4. Am I prepared to sacrifice stuff for happiness?

You cannot keep that stuff and also be happy and sane. That stuff is costing you joy, peace, calm, yourself. Your life. You need to choose between the stuff and the sanity.

MINDSET SHIFT #2: You Might Get Rid Of It, And Then Want It One Day

Many people hold on to their clutter out of fear.

They’re afraid if they get rid of an elliptical trainer that’s been used exclusively for clothes airing since 2007, then the next day they’ll be consumed by an overwhelming urge to do simulated running with exaggerated arm gestures – an urge that simply will not be satisfied by any other form of exercise.

They’re scared they’ll clear the kitchen of myriad unused appliances and utensils, only to wake the next day and find themselves possessed by the spirit of Julia Child.

They’re terrified they’ll get rid of their extensive supplies of stationery/figurines/random crap and the world will be suddenly and unaccountably plunged into a shortage of these very essentials.

Let me help you face that fear.

The truth is…

You may get rid of something and later want it.

If you’re hyperventilating at this prospect then take a breath and let’s think about it rationally. I’m not talking about crucial medication here. I’m talking about your garden variety clutter – stuff that no one uses, that takes up space and undermines the comfort of your home.

If you get rid of something and later want it, then one of two things will happen.

1. If it’s something you can replace, then you’ll have to go to some (probably not much) cost and/or inconvenience and buy or borrow another. You’ll go to the mall and order will be restored. No biggie.
2. If it’s not something you can replace or there isn’t time or the cost is prohibitive, then you’ll have to do without. Yes – I said do without. Now I know that may at first sound like a shocking prospect. But in reality it’s perfectly possible to do without stuff. You will suffer some frustration, but life will go on. You might even like the sense of freedom you get from going without something.

In almost all cases of cleared clutter, you’ll never give the items another thought, except to think how happyyou are to be rid of all that stuff you don’t need.

But yes, you may also get rid of things that you one day want again. And here’s the good news: you’ll survive.

Not only will you not die, you’ll probably hardly notice, amid the uncluttered, happy, and peaceful life you’re living.

ASIDE: As someone who adores an uncluttered home, I admit there are occasional times when I would enjoy greater convenience if I had a certain exact item on a specific occasion. But that happens so very rarely. On the other hand, I get to enjoy clarity, simplicity, an uncluttered home, and a wonderful sense of calm and order every single day of my life. The trade-off is a no-brainer.

Questions

1. Are you holding on to things, not because you use them today, but because you might want them one day? Write about this.
2. Are you sacrificing your happiness and peace of mind in the present in order to have every possible contingency for the future?
3. How would you feel if you had to get by without something? Would you be okay?

You may also get rid of things that you one day want again. And here’s the good news: you’ll survive. Not only will you not die, you’ll probably hardly notice, amid the uncluttered, happy, and peaceful life you’re living.

MINDSET SHIFT #3: It’s Okay To Dispose Of Your Stuff Imperfectly

Another thing that stops people getting rid of stuff is knowing what to do with it. People sometimes feel great pressure to dispose of their stuff ‘the right way’.

There’s a mindset shift we need to make here.

If you have the energy and motivation to sell your stuff on eBay, hold a yard sale, sort it for the right charities, and do whatever it takes to dispose of everything to the highest standards of clutter management, then you should definitely do that.

But if you’re in a bad place with your clutter, if you’re immobilized, if you’re in despair, if this pressure is stopping you actually getting rid of stuff you’ve had for years or decades, then I say let yourself off the hook and just toss it.

Get yourself out from under the mess. Next time, do better. Buy less. Donate more.

But for now, start where you are and do what you can do.

Questions

1. Do you have stuff that’s worth more than the cost of selling? Are you motivated enough to organize the sale?
   Then sell!
2. Is your stuff in good condition? Are you happy to sort stuff for donating?
   Then donate!
3. Is the thought of sorting through your stuff so overwhelming that you feel immobilized and depressed?
   Then toss – and do better next time.

Just get yourself out from under the mess. Next time, do better. Buy less. Donate more. But for now, start where you are and do what you can do.